We mirror each other subconsciously when we agree, or get on.

Mirroring is one way we can talk to the client’s or prospect’s subconscious.


It is the sales / service person’s task to get on with many different people. Not all of these people have the same way of communicating and doing business. So how can mirroring help?


Mirroring is a piece of psychology present in both the world of humans and animals. When we like or get on with each other we mirror each other’s behaviours. We mirror each other’s body language, the words we use, opinions, what we find funny, even clothing; just look at the people in your office or in your clients’ offices and see if there is clothing mirroring going on.


Observe any social situation and you can see mirroring all the time. In a bar or restaurant we see people standing in the same way, holding their glasses in the same way, sitting in the same way, reflecting each other’s body language.


In meetings we can observe how people who are agreeing tend to have the same body language; leaning forward, smiling, nodding and having good eye contact.


Mirroring is an automatic subconscious reaction. Some people ask us; ‘Won’t they notice if we try to mirror them?’ Generally no, not unless you’re mimicking their every move, but most of the time people will be busy concentrating on the conversation.


In telephone sales we can mirror in many ways including; the pace of the prospect or client; their choice of words; the tone of their conversation; their attitude or disposition; their level of friendliness or formality; the speed of their conversation.


How can we use mirroring in terms of body language?


Through mirroring body language we can talk to the prospect’s or client’s subconscious. If they have a relaxed body position, we do the same. If they lean forward, we lean forward. We mirror their body language talking to their subconscious, which makes them feel more comfortable with us. We can mirror how they are sitting or standing; what they do with their arms and hands whilst talking; how much eye contact to give; how formal or relaxed their position is. Mirroring will help them to feel comfortable with us, because their subconscious is telling them ‘I can do business with this person’.


To prove this idea, at lunchtime go to the nearest café or restaurant and observe people’s body language. Then do the same in the next meeting you attend, whether this be internal or external. Observe how people who are comfortable with each other tend to reflect each other’s body language.


This is a simple tip but it can make a lot of difference, especially when we meet new people. We will have more on mirroring in future posts.


Let us know your thoughts, views and observations on this point by leaving a message on this blog.



Making a good impression with prospects & clients – The Power of Mirroring part 1